i spent a majority of my life having really high perception on myself over other people.
call me narcissistic, but im just being honest.
i am just really comfortable with myself and i feel really confident.
but when I started to get to know my classmates, co-workers and acquaintances at RPI, i know where i belong on the totem pole. my feet are finally grounded again.
it's been almost 3 weeks and i havent received any job offers from companies at the career fair.
seeing people walking around campus in suits going for interviews really do make me feel like i dont have a chance.
well honestly i didnt plan on getting an internship but somehow something just pushed me to apply.(i honestly dont know why).
i figured that i'd give it a shot and see how it goes.
but it turns out that it is tougher than i thought; the wait is killing me!
if the companies would just call and tell me that i was rejected, then i'd be totally fine.
dont keep me waiting, dear companies.
i just spent almost half of today trying to figure out a piece of code and i still cant understand it.
the best part is, the part of code that i was trying to make sense of, is not really the answer to my lab questions, it's just an explanation of how the answer could be obtained.
in a sense, an answer to get an answer. (im not making sense, am i?)
it's really stressful to be the only one taking some of the courses that im taking right now.
but you know what? what doesnt kill you makes you stronger.
i am currently abstaining myself from any sort of human dependency; let it be for support, or for love.
because at the end of the day, it does make you a stronger person. well at least i hope so.
brain is about to explode because of all this but i am glad that Allah is always with me when i wake up in the morning and when i shut my eyes at night.
we should all train ourselves to rely on no one but Allah.
the road to righteousness is not easy, but it's one beautiful ride if you're with Allah.
i shall sleep now. tomorrow shall be a crazier day. and i shall strive my best insyaAllah
more of a reminder to myself, then everyone else: dont worry about the results. just focus on the means.
wallahualam..
salam warahmatullah..
PS : tomorrow's first day of zulhijjah! the first ten days of zulhijjah is aweehsoomeee (do google if you do not know what i mean) =D
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